


Stubborn Love

by literatiruinedme



Category: Rogue One: A Star Wars Story (2016)
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-18
Updated: 2017-10-18
Packaged: 2019-01-19 03:03:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,072
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12401751
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/literatiruinedme/pseuds/literatiruinedme
Summary: He was still looking at her, though he seemed to be incredibly relaxed. Her chest tightened slightly at the smile on his lips. “What?”“Just looking at you,” he shrugged, pulling the covers back for her.





	Stubborn Love

Complete and total darkness. He'd somehow talked her into being blindfolded, him and his clever tongue, and she was surrounded by complete and total darkness.

“You're doing beautifully,” he assured her, his hands landing softly on her hips. She didn't jump  _ per se _ , but she knew he'd recognise that he'd surprised her. His little laugh made her blush with embarrassment. “I promise,” he said, slowly trailing his hands up and down her sides. She wasn't tied down, probably some insight from him on how she'd likely get too anxious at being restrained at some point before they were through and have to try again at a later date or never again- especially when she was already down one sense.

“Can you-” she paused, licking her lips. “Just, please keep talking.”

She knew he was frowning. “Are you alright?”

“Me?” Her voice sounded nervous even to her own ears. “Never better.”

She heard his knees crack as he crouched down in-between her thighs. Her chair creaked slightly when she shifted. His arms rested atop her thighs. “Jyn, what's wrong?” She jumped again when she felt his lips brush her breast bone. “Come on,” he coaxed.

She shook her head, swallowing hard around the lump in her throat. “I'm fine.”

Before she could even think, Cassian was on his feet, pulling the blindfold from over her eyes and grabbing his jacket and draping it over her shoulders to offer her a breath of modesty. He knelt down again, taking one of her hands in his. “We really don't have to do this,” he promised, pressing a kiss to each of her knuckles.

She pulled her hand from his and leaned down, cupping his face before she pulled his mouth to hers. The kiss was sweet, tender. She licked her lips when she saw the soft expression he offered her after they pulled back. He was so patient. She adored it. “Just give me a minute?”

He nodded, giving her a gentle smile. “We don't have to-”

“I want to,” she promised, putting her arms through the sleeves of his vastly too-big jacket. “I just need to breathe.”

He nodded, leaning forward to wrap his arms around her waist and rested his face against her stomach. Her arms wrapped around his neck, one hand tangling in his hair as she'd done so many times before. She bit her lip when his beard scratched the tender skin of her belly. He chuckled, somehow noticing the reaction, and lightly scratched his chin over her stomach.

“Stop,” she laughed, not bothering to move her hands or her arms from around him.

“It's fun to make you squirm,” he smirked, staring her down before he pounced, quickly rising to his feet, his mouth on hers in a heartbeat. She chuckled at the movement, her laughter quickly disintegrated as they fell into a heated kiss. Her hands tightened in his hair as he pulled her first to her feet, and then lifted her so she could wrap her limbs around his waist. He carefully walked them back towards their bunk, his mouth never wavering against hers. He set her down gently, their lips never leaving one another's. One hand slowly trailed up her side, curving under her shoulder to hold her close as he settled between her thighs.

She pulled away, chewing on her bottom lip as she glanced up at him. She swallowed hard as her fingers gently traced along his jaw. “I want to try again,” she said slowly.

“Are you sure?” He asked, brows knitting together. “We don't have to. If you'd rather just go to bed, I wouldn't-”

“No,” she interrupted softly. “I want to.”

He was quiet for a moment, eyes searching her face before he nodded once. “Okay,” he said softly, kissing her hard once again before slowly pulling away. He pulled her into his lap when he sat up, producing the scarf from his back pocket. He straightened it out, refolding it a few times before he lifted the fabric up. “Close your eyes,” he said, waiting until she did so before carefully placing the fabric to block her line of vision. He tied a knot at a slight angle so she wouldn't have to deal with it digging into her scalp when she lay back. He fiddled with the fabric for a few moments longer before his fingers trailed down her cheeks and his palm slid down to rest on her neck. “Is this okay?”

“Yeah,” she breathed, nodding after a moment of hesitation, the air slightly thicker than the last time they began. 

“We can stop at any time,” he promised. She knew he was giving her that soft smile he always gave her when they were alone, the one that said he loved her so fiercely.

“I know,” she nodded, smiling and leaning into the hand he raised. “I want to try again, it's just…”

“Not used to it?”

She chortled, turning her head to press a kiss into his palm. “Lot of trust.” He was so warm and safe; it made her heart ache.

He tangled his fingers in her hair just before pressing his lips to hers. “Of course.” He carefully helped her out of his jacket, laying her down on the bed. He pulled back as he slowly dragged his nails along her scalp, making her shift slightly from the pleasure, gasping at his touch. She could feel him grinning; he was shameless, after all. He pulled back from her slowly, her bottom lip between his teeth. Leaning over, his breath ghosted along her ear. “Put your hands over your head.” She nodded, following his instruction. She felt his weight shift and he leaned up. He slowly pressing kisses along the tender skin of her arms, his lips following a path over her shoulders and up her neck. His lips landed on a spot just behind her ear that never failed to make her whimper, her hands desperately clinging to the sheets so she wouldn't move.

(He'd been all too excited to cuff her hands over her head when she'd touched him after being instructed not to in the past.)

She bit her lip when he dragged his tongue over the spot he'd been kissing, her left leg hitching over his. Her breath caught when she felt his fingers on her inner thigh. “ _ Cassian _ .”

“Do you remember the night my mouth was on you for  _ hours _ ?” he whispered in her ear.

She swallowed hard, a rush of heat washing over her. She'd come over and over, feeling boneless and sated by the time he finally decided she'd had enough. His nose brushed along her cheek, snapping her back to reality. “Yes.” She didn't mean to sound that breathless,  _ fuck _ .

“Part of me wants to do that  _ again _ .”

“I-”

“Of course, I do want to take advantage of you like this,” he confessed, unwrapping her leg from around him.

“Cassian, no-” She wrapped her arms around his neck, no longer caring about him telling her to keep her hands away. She bit the inside of her cheek when she realised how scared she may have sounded.

“Hey,” his tone changed instantly, one arm wrapping around her as the other slowly rubbed up and down her arm. “Talk to me.”

“I-” her voice cracked when Cassian reached up, carefully pushing the blindfold from over here eyes. He has a frown on his lips and love in his eyes, but his expression was one of concern. She frowned, swallowing hard. “I'm sorry.”

His small frown deepened. He carefully flipped them and pulled her into his lap in one fluid motion. “Don't be sorry,” he said, leaning forward to press a kiss to her forehead. “There's no need for you to be.”

“But I-”

“Hey,” he breathed, thumb soothingly rubbing back and forth over her shoulder blade. “There is no reason for you to feel badly.”

“I should be able to handle a silly blind fold,” she huffed, crossing her arms over her chest. She looked down and off to the side, eyes focused on the sheets beside them. 

His finger under her chin pulled her attention back to him. “We've both had our fair share of trauma,” he shrugged. “It's understandable we have issues with random everyday items.” She chortled, her forehead against his, her hands coming up to rest on his shoulders. “You know I can't have my wrists bound.”

Unless he was in a mission setting, he'd panic horribly at being restrained. She'd asked him to help her demonstrate with one of the training classes she'd taken on and he'd almost choked her in front of two dozen recruits. Her pained,  _ Cassian, you're hurting me _ , had quickly pulled him back and made a confused Han (the Alliance required he attend a class, she'd agreed it was stupid) order and escort everyone out. The room was cleared almost immediately while she'd uncuffed him. She'd held him when his knees gave out, when he'd found reality again and finally realised what had happened. He'd sobbed into her chest, his arms wrapped tight around her.

The bruising had lasted a week.

He wouldn't touch her for two.

“We're a mess,” she laughed sadly.

He pulled her tight against him. “I wouldn't want to be one with anyone else.”

She smiled, fingers light against his skin and the side of his face. “I love you, too.”

He gave her a bashful smile, letting his chin fall against her chest. He looked up when her fingers trailed along his cheek. He closed his eyes as he leaned forward to rest his forehead against hers. “Let's get some sleep.”

“Probably a good idea,” she sighed. His hands fell to her hips. Neither of them made any effort to move. He let out a sigh, dropping his forehead to her shoulder. “Cassian?”

“Yes?”

“Can you let go of me so I can get a shirt?”

His head snapped up, his eyes wide with the sudden realisation that she was still naked. She laughed, fingers tangling in his hair. “Never thought I'd say this, but go put some clothes on.”

She leaned forward, kissing him hard. When she's pulled back her followed before he realised himself, his cheeks turning a slight red tinge when she tugged his hair, leaning close to whisper in his ear. “You say that too frequently for my taste, but it's funny every time.”

(He usually said it while frantically pulling on his trousers as he ran to open the door to their room or in a supply closet when they were late for a meeting. She'd always just grin and roll her eyes before complying.)

She nipped at his earlobe before crawling from his lap and stalking over to their set of dressers. She reached in, pulled one of his shirts and a pair of her panties out. She tugged the shirt over her head, the material soft with wear against her skin, before stepping into the pair of underwear he'd picked up as a gift for her the last time they were off-world. When she turned back, Cassian had moved to lay down under the covers. He was still looking at her, though he seemed to be incredibly relaxed. Her chest tightened slightly at the smile on his lips. “What?”

“Just looking at you,” he shrugged, pulling the covers back for her.

She smiled, walking back over to him. She pulled herself up onto the bunk, under the sheets and into his open arms. She curled up to him, her head tucked under his chin, one arm slung over his waist. “You think we'll ever  _ not _ be like this?”

He sighed, slowly rubbing his hand up and down her back. “Possibly?” He shrugged one shoulder. “I never thought that far into the future. Figured I wouldn't live that long, so it wouldn't matter.”

“And now?”

He huffed out a short breath. “I really don't know.” He shifted under her, his arm tightening and then relaxing around her shoulders. “I think we'll have time.”

“Time,” she breathed, leaning up to kiss the column of his throat. She settled back against him, a small smile on her lips. “What a novel little thing.”

“A luxury.”

She hummed, heavy eyelids slipping shut. “A luxury we may actually live to see.”

“Just maybe.” She knew he was smiling, his voice was so light.

“Hopefully,” she agreed.

He huffed a laugh. “Jyn?” She hummed. “Sleep.”


End file.
